AITA for not wanting my partner’s ex-wife to be our surrogate and for being upset he lied about being married twice?

My partner (M41) and I (F40) have been together for 2 years. We live together and have talked seriously about having a child. He has a 3-year-old daughter from his previous marriage, but I don’t have any children of my own.

I’ve always wanted kids, but I’ve struggled with infertility my whole life. Recently, after 20+ years of problems, I was officially diagnosed with endometriosis. I also found out that one ovary doesn’t work at all and the other has very few eggs left. It’s been a lot to process.

Last night we were talking about options, and surrogacy came up. Out of nowhere, he suggested his first wife could be our surrogate because she “owes him a life debt.” At first, I laughed because he and his (more recent) ex-wife don’t get along at all. But then he clarified: he wasn’t talking about his second wife (his daughter’s mom). He married someone when he was 19.

Apparently, he had a college friend from Nigeria whose visa was about to expire, and they got married so she could stay. He said it was just a business arrangement. He also mentioned that he did it because he wanted to do something nice for someone. They never lived together or slept together. Honestly, that part doesn’t bother me.

What does bother me is that when I asked him at the very beginning of our relationship how many times he had been married, he said once. We’ve been together for two years, live together, and share so many personal details. I was shocked to find out like this.

When I said I wasn’t sure how I felt about his ex-wife (transactional or not) carrying our baby, he got upset. He told me I should be grateful he’s even offering and accused me of being ungrateful for not “taking advantage of this nice thing.” I tried to explain that I’m not the bad guy here, and just need to process the fact that he lied about his marriage history, and that I don’t feel comfortable with this idea.

So… AITA for being upset he lied about being married twice and for not wanting his first ex-wife to be our surrogate?