I don’t want to live anymore

Everything has been awful since 2020 and it hasn’t really been any better. I wouldn’t kill myself right now but I just want to disappear and I wish I never existed. I love my mom but anytime I talk to her about issues she’s not that good at comforting me, she always blames my anxiety’s on my phone, me overreacting, or me just being “hormonal”. If things don’t get better by the time I turn 18 I’m ending it all.