Feeling overwhelmed as the only earner in my family. 34M 30F

I’m a married man with 2 kids, and I’m the only one earning in my family. We’ve been in the US for the past 3 years. Honestly, I feel like I’ve been carrying financial burdens my whole life.

Back home in India, I was the eldest son, so I had to start earning at a young age because our family wasn’t doing well financially. I worked and studied simultaneously, eventually earning my doctorate from IIT. I then got married and moved to the US for work. From the outside, it probably looks like we’re doing well, good job, happy family, going on outings. But inside, I feel like I’m drowning.

The thing is, I am a happy person around my family. I don’t show them what I’m going through. I’m always playing with my kids, enjoying with them, trying to give them a good childhood. But when I’m alone — working late or lying in bed trying to sleep, the horror of the financial burden hits me. My mind won’t stop racing, and many nights I can’t sleep at all.

Here’s the reality:

• Every paycheck goes to kids, family outings, outside food, shopping, etc.
• My wife doesn’t want to work right now, which I understand since she’s focused on the kids. However, she also spends quite a bit, and if I bring it up, it often leads to fights or makes her upset.
• Whenever I try to go out to play sports (that make me feel good), she gets angry and says Why do I always have to handle kids, which I understand, so I don't go.
• I send money back to India to support my parents and siblings.
• Unexpected expenses keep piling up.

On the surface, we’re enjoying life, but deep down, I’m stressed, frustrated, anxious, and honestly… lonely. Sometimes I feel like screaming, crying, or just running away. I don’t know how much longer I can keep juggling everything without breaking down.

I guess I’m just venting here, but if anyone has been in a similar situation, how do you cope? How do you balance family happiness with financial reality without losing your mind?