PPD?

I’m posting here because I have no one else to talk to. For backstory i’m Canadian but moved to Italy 3 years ago, me and my partner have a 3 month old baby (first and only). I’ve always struggled with depression throughout my life but I definitely feel so down on myself now. My boyfriends family only speak italian which i also speak but not fluently so i feel a distance in the relationship we’re not close, with my own family i have a long history of a tumultuous relationship, i have no friends in italy because the people i met all ended up going back to their home countries, in canada I have literally 1 friend. I feel really alone and kinda always have my whole life. My partner is amazing but i feel bad for him because he’s so happy go lucky positive and im a drag. i also feel bad for my baby because she deserves a happy confident mom.