What did I do wrong? He seems to get bothered quickly

I reconnected with a guy in January. This is a guy I dated last year but broke up with him due to similar reasons. As a friend he was GREAT but he never planned dates and made me feel like it was a “me” problem. I’m 31 still living with my parents so obviously I can’t do things like have him stay over. My parents told me he should plan dates and not randomly show up at their house at 11pm to say hello. I like this guy but I feel like I’m doing everything wrong.

I need opinions because this dating world is confusing me.

So last week he told me he would be in my area to record a scene. He’s a music producer. He wanted to invite me. He said it was going to be Saturday. He never reached out so I thought he forgot. On Monday, he texted me in the morning saying he would be coming to my area to finally record the scene. He said he would be here around 7:30-7:45pm. I actually didn’t make plans Saturday because I thought it was Saturday and not Monday.

So I got ready and no call. At 8:15 he told me he was barely coming and would be there at 9:15. I told him I would just stay home since I wake up early for work …I wake up at 5am. He begged to please watch him for at least 10 minutes and was bothered the fact I was bothered. So I did stay until 10:15pm. I told him I seriously had to go. So I left and around 11pm he called. I was asleep and missed the calls. I woke up to a text saying “I’m done recording” not sure if he still wanted to hang out or the reason why he called after I left. I texted him at 5am telling him I fell asleep right after I left but hope his training went well. Never responded. I think he’s bothered.

This guy never plans things out and I’m over whelmed at the fact that he just Calls the day of expecting for me to drop everything. I wish he would stick to a plan.

Theres times he calls randomly to see me. Sometimes I agree because it’s early. one time he was supposed to see me at around 8pm and well he ended up coming at 11pm because he got busy doing stuff …. He has mentioned things like “it’s hard for you to not be so available bc you still live at your parents” 😥

He has mentioned plans in the future which never happened and to be honest I need to plan. He wants to do a get away and told him he needs to tell me when. I can’t just do random trips. I need to plan and also let me parents know in advance when I’ll be gone.

FYI: I have a work trip today and staying at a hotel. I had invited him but I never got a confirmation. I told him I would get a room with a coworker but if he came I would just get it myself so he can stay with me.

Never responded and have a feeling he will just text randomly at 5pm. Is it too much to ask for to plan dates ? Or am I being too strict?