Living with in-laws + SIL is driving me insane, can’t wait to move out

Hey Reddit, I just need to vent a little (and maybe get some perspective).

So, I currently live with my in-laws: MIL & FIL (both early 60s), and my SIL who’s 30. Me and my husband (both in our 30s) have been married 2 years, and we’re finally waiting on the completion date for our new home 🤞🏼❤️. Honestly, I cannot wait.

The main issue: SIL is absolutely hopeless. Rude, unhelpful, and just… exhausting. Examples:

• She never tidies up after herself. If she uses a blanket on the sofa, it’ll stay there until MIL or FIL fold it and put it away.
• She cooks these big elaborate meals — only for herself — using up all the ingredients in the house, leaves everything out, doesn’t clean up, doesn’t put leftovers away. MIL/FIL (and sometimes me and my husband) end up cleaning it all.
• We have this unspoken rule of no phones at the dinner table, but of course it doesn’t apply to her. She’ll sit with headphones in, scrolling on her phone, only speaking if she can make it about herself or her opinions.
• She’s a “my way or no way” person, especially with politics. She’ll push her views constantly and talk like she’s the only one who knows anything.
• So much more to add but this is long enough!

Recently, my husband suggested I take a step back and stop picking up the slack for her, so his parents can see how little she actually does. So I did. I stopped doing as much laundry, stopped helping as much in the kitchen, and me and my husband started spending more time out of the house.

Well… MIL sat me down for one of her “chats” (this has happened before and it's usually about how I'm not making an effort with SIL (because I refuse to tidy up after her!) and how I need to be more involved). And, of course, it’s all my fault:

• I’m not engaged with anyone but my husband
• I’m out of the house too much and make my husband “speak for me”
• I don’t help anymore
• I don’t speak to SIL
• My husband has stepped back and isn’t “happy in the house”
• And apparently, the fact we’re moving (only 30 mins away) is my fault because I’m dragging her son out of their home and it’s “not fair” on them

Like… what?? It’s been less than 2 weeks since I stepped back and already she’s saying they (MIL & FIL) are left doing everything. Exactly what my husband said would happen — but instead of blaming SIL, it’s all coming down on me.

My husband sees this as a “win” because his parents are finally realizing how much they’re carrying, but honestly, I just feel blamed and more frustrated. I can’t laugh it off when I’m constantly the scapegoat.

I seriously cannot wait to get out of here.

Side note: I hardly ever go out — maybe 2-3 times a week, one of which is for work, another to see family. My husband keeps telling me to go into the office more just to get out of the house, and I think I might start doing that just to survive the next couple of months.

Thanks if you read all this. Just needed to rant.