I’m not sure why I’m not happy

I’m a 24 M who’s married, has a house, friends, and a dog. But I don’t feel happy at all. I don’t feel lucky. I know I should. On paper I should have everything I can ask for. But I just hate myself. I don’t want to be alive. I go between not feeling anything and just being upset with brief moment of feeling good. I’ve never had any talents or been special in any way. I can’t think of a single good thing about myself. I’m paranoid that everyone actually hates me or just doesn’t care. I know that’s crazy. Why would my wife marry me if she didn’t like me? I don’t know. It’s just how I feel. I can’t like comprehend someone really liking or loving me the real me. It just seems impossible. How could someone love someone who’s worthless and only messes everything up. I’m just filled with anger and sorrow. I just feel like if I died no one would truly care. It doesn’t feel like anyone truly knows me or cares for me. I don’t even know what I want. I don’t even know why I’m writing this. Maybe just to get it off my chest cause I feel like I can’t tell anyone anything. I don’t know. I don’t know anything really.