it’s time

Hey all, I’ve been struggling with my drinking for quite awhile now, have had numerous attempts and for the last couple months it’s like I just stopped caring altogether.

Well I drank on my day off yesterday (I usually drink after work as well lol) and I just woke up feeling so so sooo anxious. I haven’t had hangxiety like this ever but I have to go to work in half an hour and I’m absolutely dreading it.

I think it’s time I really put some more effort into stopping, I end up buying things I don’t need, I’ve gained like a tremendous amount of weight, and I just don’t get things done that I’m supposed to get done. Like if I’m not at work usually I’m just rotting in my bed drinking. Waking up like this and contemplating what little PTO I have to use to come in late just isn’t sustainable. I’m going to end up losing my job if I keep this cycle going. My birthday is coming up next week and I have plans to drink with my friends and I might not even do that.

I dunno I just feel like I needed to post and put it out into the world to take an honest first step. IWNDWYT.