Feeling Sick on Friday night at home alone

Asp here, every stupid friday, from midnight to 3 AM, I hear people comming with cars back home, obviously had a good time (laughed, talk a lot after they get out of car). I'm still young, and I feel like someone is stabbing me in my heart when I hear the young girl voices, I cannot explain it, I think I'm missing out.

What I feel when it's happening

- Anger/rage on surface and envy/dissapointment and being useless, inside (that people enjoy without me), how can they be so rude to have good time without me?

I also have nonexistent skills and I don't feel inside I need to socialize, but then why this feeling? when I know and feel I don't want to do that, why then it comes at me at night all of sudden? it's urgging and it's like something to do with my conscience. What should be done, it feels fixed as if I have no control over it, I can either close the window or just think I'm not hearing it, but I cannot process it..

It's like torture - I don't feel to want to socialize, but then when I hear/see people having good time and enjoy without me, suddenly I feel lost.