2nd time on shrooms 12grams hellish experience

(I think it was 2018 - 27 years old) I got 12 grams of shrooms from my friend Tyler and decided to eat them all because I wanted to have a holy experience like the first 7 grams I had back in 2011. But it was totally not holy rather demonic. At first it wasn't bad but the more time went on I began feeling bad. The only way I can describe it is like I was bad in the sight of God because I was a sinner or I felt like Lucifer or how a demon feels because it is evil in God's sight. And maybe I had demons in me and that's why I felt like that also that I wasn't Christian and forgiven or praying. Anyways while I was at the peak of the mushrooms It felt like my mind's eye opened again and at the same time my face eyes closed and it was more comfortable to have them closed for some reason, I was walking around the house with my eyes closed most of the time. At this time I started having a repeating vision of a earth but completely hellish. The earth was black, cracked and dry, the sky was red and suspended in the air was one rose that was beautiful, but it shriveled up and died, and the vision repeated for some time, also as the rose shriveled up and died I also felt inside that I shriveled up and partially died but I don't know if it did permanent damage, it was just a feeling maybe. Also having my minds eye open to all this evil, I started saying out loud "I'm not supposed to know" like how Adam and Eve were not supposed to know evil. I started feeling like Adam. I don't how else to describe it. Anyways I slept off the mushrooms and to my stupidity didn't even think about giving my life to Jesus yet but I did eventually years later which is another story.