How do I get a diagnosis?

How do I know if I have bpd/quiet bpd? How do I get a diagnosis without straight up asking my Psychiatrist?

A bit of a backstory:

I am 28 F, I used to see a child psychiatrist starting from the age of 12 when I started exhibiting signs of anxiety, depression, and SH. I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Major Depressive Disorder and was medicated and continued to see my psychiatrist until I was 18. I was diagnosed with ADHD shortly before turning 18. From then on I just had my pharmacist or walk in renew my prescriptions until I got a family doctor, who now handles my meds. For the past year I have been slowly spiraling, until recently its been downhill fast. My doctor put me off work for a few months to experiment with my meds, and ultimately he referred me to see a Psychiatrist at my wish. I have been seeing a lot about Borderline Personality Disorder, and "quiet" bpd and I have found myself relating to a lot of the symptoms. How do I go about seeing a diagnosis from my psychiatrist? How did you get your diagnosis?

Current mental health meds: Effexor 300mg Vyvanse 40mg Abilify 4mg