My girlfriend is great, but I am not.

My gf and I have been dating for 3 years now (we're both in our late 20s), don't live together yet, but she's planning to move in with me in the near future. People constantly tell me how lucky I am to have her and I couldn't agree more. She is kind, smart, funny, beautiful and organized, while I am almost the opposite.

I never had good grades in school and often I take longer than the average person to understand something. She will beat me in every single game we play, no matter if it's a videogame or a puzzle or a board game. I am quite obese. I am working on reducing weight, but I often mess up and catch myself "treating myself" to something unhealthy. Results are often an increase in weight and me crying, while she tries her hardest to comfort me. I do cry pretty often about work, my weight, anxiety or other things, but I try to not bother her too much with it so I don't annoy her.

I am very messy and forgetful. We share about 50/50 of the housework chores, most of the time it takes me double the time to clean up because I keep getting distracted or I just don't know where to put something. My side of the bedroom is often quite messy, but I won't allow her to clean up after me.

Honestly I don't deserve her, and I told her about my feelings, but she just said that I do "so much for her", even though she couldn't tell me any specifics. Whenever she has any trouble I cheer her up and help her of course, but that happens very rarely, while I'm whining and feeling sorry for myself every other week or so.

Sometimes I feel like she's a diamond dating a trash can. I really, really don't want to loose her. I truely try to be someone she can call a good partner, but fuck it's hard.