My come completely messed with my emotions

I’m 17F me and my mom don’t have the best relationship I tried in the past but things never seemed to worked so I stopped trying.

I have a childhood pet tortoise I had for 9 years. I love her a lot. She was my best friend when I had none. I bonded with this tortoise her name is Turtle lol.

While I was taking a nap I hear this loud chainsaw I assumed it was my mother because she likes doing outside work then I went back to my nap. Then I woke Up to knocking on my door. “Did you take tortoise inside?” Because our tortoise likes being outside ( she’s protected ofc dw lol ) I said no well I didn’t. Then she asked my brother.

My older brother is rather neglectful of the tortoise so I was concerned when she asked him.

Then she went downstairs and purposefully said loudly how she couldn’t find her. Then my fu-king heart dropped I went downstairs then our backyard.

My mom was digging shit for god know what Istg that woman just be doing shit just to do it. Then she kept repeating herself how she killed her.

The thing with my mom when I show a strongq reaction with something that I don’t like she is going to keep repeating it to I snap. So I didn’t I told her to shut up. And I didn’t held back I hate this woman bottom of my heart she was so neglecting my whole life and her saying she killed my childhood pet was my last straw.

But she didn’t shut up she kept saying then I got tears in my eyes. I kept repeating myself “she’s gone” she’s really gone digging up some dirt to find her.

MOMENTS later my mom easily founded her. So I knew this was to fuck with me why do I know this cuz she done this before. I called her out “you knew you didn’t kill her you only said it to get a reaction” the bitch smiled.