I am so happy my husband did this...

My husband and I both (Both 50 somethings) work in HiTech. I work from home all the time unless I have to travel or go into the office for an odd meeting. This means occasionally one or the other of us having to travel for work. Now you need to understand that we had a lot of issues with sex for a very long time. We went to sex therapy and got things going in the right direction, so sex is very important for us. Traveling for work obviously means no sex, and I genuinely miss having sex with him even for a few days.

I also suffer from depression and anxiety and have medication for those. This is part of the reason that sex is so important. The medication kills my sex drive, so I need to work at it to keep it up. I don't ever want to go back to what we had, or didn't have, before we got help.

Anyway Last week he was away for the whole week. He left Sunday morning to head to the San Fran Bay Area, and was there all week. I hate when he takes overnight flights because it wipes him out and I feel so bad for him, so I always tell him to stay the extra day and come back the next day so he can get as good of a nights sleep as he can. So he was going to come back Saturday. Given time differences and lay over he would be traveling all day, so I wouldn't see him till nearly midnight.

Anyway, last week I was feeling particularly needy. I really missed him so much. We would call each night. We had a couple of dirty video calls to help ease the pressure. But I really missed him. I was quite sad, though I was careful not to let him know. I was starting to get breakthrough anxiety as well over every sound the house was making.

Friday was horrible. I had a light day at work so nothing to distract me there. I tried all my usually tricks to help distract me from anxiety. I went to the gym. I did an extra workout on the treadmill. Tried to have coffee with one of my girlfriends but she was busy. I tried thinking of positive things. My last resort when my husband isn't hear for anxiety ends up being sucking my thumb and that didn't work. (Don't judge me I am very orally fixated and it beats smoking which I gave up about 25 years ago.) Literally nothing was working. I even tried masturbating but even that got interrupted by the endless cycle in my head when I heard a car door slam next door. (I can laugh about it now because it's passed, but I am mid 50s, mom bod, completely naked, running around the house, peeking out thought the curtains trying to see what's going on.) It got even worse because as a way to try and distract myself I sent my husband some dirty pictures, and then when I tried to call him he made an excuse about his phone dying and his charger being lost.

Anyway, Saturday morning I woke up to him coming home. Without telling me, he had changed his flight home. He left for the airport right after his last meeting, caught the first flight out of San Fran. Middle seats the entire flight with three layovers. As soon as I saw him I started crying. I was so happy that he was home. I just got him undressed and in bed, wrapped myself around him and broke down crying uncontrollably for about 10 minutes. I don't know how, but he just knew that I needed him. I was trying so hard to keep it together and be strong... but in the end I just melted when I saw him.

I love so much that he just somehow knew that I needed him, and what he put himself through to get home to me early. He slept a lot yesterday because he was exhausted, but I was just so glad to have him back. I actually spent time sitting on the bed watching him sleep... Yeh I know... it's weird... but when you have gone through what I went thought last week in my own head... sometimes weird is ok... LOL

I just have to say, as I am sitting here typing this, looking over at him, I am the luckiest girl in the world right now.