Binding my pesonality to a Cardinal sin gave me motivation

An Honest observation I've started to become numb and emotionaly detached after some experiences ive had that left me feeling a bit too numb and in turn made me expand my horizons a bit too overboard and now i am too aware of everything.

Oh and well it feels whatever i do will never be enough on a grander scale of everything and at this point ive became some what of a nihilist.

But I've been seeing some patterns recently seeing that i only exel and enjoy something when it involves my pride and desires on the line.

I dug into it and concluded its a characteristics of some of the cardinal sins.

And that really begs the question what the hell is wrong with me.