MIL got mad when I said that my doc ok’d me in having more children

I just had my final postpartum appointment after giving birth to twins. The doctor told me my body is recovering well and that, physically, I could try for another baby next year. I was really happy to hear that … not because I actually want more kids (I have three now, including these newborn twins, and that’s more than enough!) but because it made me feel proud and grateful that my body is healing.

When I got home, I shared this with my MIL. Instead of being happy for me, she got angry. She said, “You two are in no position to have another child. I’m not going to help anymore.” Then she said if I feel that way, I should just “go back to America; maybe you’d get help there but not here and from me anymore.” (Context: I’m a foreigner living in Japan, she’s 73, she’s had 4 kids of her own with no help, she has been helping me with housework and food and occasionally with the twins and my oldest.)

I was shocked. I only wanted to share my joy, not announce plans for more babies. I sometimes jokingly say things like “I could have ten kids,” because everyone knows I love children (I was a pediatric speech therapist and elementary teacher) and she told me never to say stuff like that again because it “triggers” her.

To add to it, she had just watched my twins for a couple hours while I went to the doctor, so she was tired. I understand that, but her reaction still hurt. I already hate feeling like a burden, and her words made me feel guilty just for needing help sometimes.

I get that my husband has changed jobs often so it’s making things difficult.

Low key she’s right, we don’t need more kids… but damn…

Has anyone else dealt with in-laws reacting negatively when you share happy or hopeful news? How do you balance cultural/family differences with your own feelings?