My father is almost fully transitioned, and I work with him. I can’t get over my feelings.

Hey all, fairly quick post here.

Some foreground, I’m not in the slightest homophobic, transphobic, or otherwise discriminatory. I believe all people have a right to their bodies and the choices they make for it. My father is transitioned but still goes by He/Him.

My (23M) father (63F) came out as trans about 2 years ago. Absolutely shattered our family for multiple reasons. First, my mother has felt lied to because my father also came out as Lesbian. She already dealt with a lot of marital issues prior so she’s completely against it. Not transphobic, but a “please don’t wear a dress around the house” feeling. My father lost his mind over it and continuously picks on her when talking to me. My siblings are supportive, but don’t wanna hear about it for good reasons. Some of my siblings don’t talk to him at all anymore, which is fine.

He also transitioned after ONE APPOINTMENT at a therapist. Never returned after that.

He does this thing where when he gets the chance, he will talk all about his transitioning. I’m happy for him, but I’m his son. I grew up with a half assed father figure, suddenly that mutual connection is gone because he’s turned his personality to be less physically active. He also kind of drains you for compliments, wishing you point out something on him. This total shift in personality outside of transitioning has made it incredibly difficult to reason with him, because transitioning has given him a false sense of freedom, so he’s been far less responsible, especially financially.

But now the biggest bombshell of the experience has fallen on me. He’s gonna start presenting himself at work. Mind you, we work in a blue collar shop with half liberals half conservatives. A few of them support him, but a lot also don’t, again, some won’t speak to him anymore. Not only does presenting himself at work open the door for harassment, but it just doesn’t seem necessary. I can understand dressing up when at home, going out, etc, but at work? With some hardcore conservatives that already don’t speak to you over it??

And of course, I’m hiding the fact I’m going to be utterly embarrassed with him there. I don’t want to think about it, but I know how he acts is just gonna draw attention to the both of us. It pains me to acknowledge it, but it’s kind of obvious that he is transitioned, which I know is going to get the most attention from my coworkers.

The obvious answer of moving away/jobs isn’t in my cards right now. I love my dad to death, but if I’m gonna be in this situation for the next half decade, I wanna at least feel like I can reasonably be uncomfortable and be able to resent properly.

Any advice?