I thought too highly of myself

I genuinely thought I was a semipassoid, holy fucking shit I need to rope. All of that time and effort and I’m absolutely humiliated by these “progressive” fat bitches ingmi. I will never be a real man. I am not a man to them, I am a timid, soft-spoken shy tomboy lesbian with short hair. They/them at most. I genuinely had this idea in my head that I would be able to fit in with cis men. What’s the point