Hello, I would like to know if any of you have similar experiences to mine.

Good morning, I'm writing this a bit like a bottle in the sea, I'm not doing well at all, sorry if it's poorly written sometimes. I have always had problems in my relationships with others, in particular I always end up stuck in awful, particularly toxic relationships. For two years I have felt excruciatingly alone. I always do everything for people, and I expect nothing in return other than a minimum of respect and friendship. Except I never get anything positive in return. I managed to get rid of a very negative environment in my old city, and a year ago I had to come back and live with my parents (a very, very toxic relationship but they took me in). I have the rest of my family around me but that's it. I'm always in isolation I am no longer able to meet people, I am no longer able to socialize at all, to create bonds with people. I don't have any friends anymore. I feel terribly alone and I suffer greatly. I have tried a lot of dating sites, to make friends or relationships, but the exchanges always go very badly. I get rejected or ghosted as soon as I announce that I'm neurodivergent. I am no longer able to have a connection with humans, to create one. I can no longer bear the slightest conversation. Everything is becoming too difficult for me. I can no longer just talk. I can no longer bear rejection after rejection and their nastiness. I feel like no one understands me. No one understands how I feel. People don't even want to understand, they're not interested, they don't ask questions. Sorry this is probably very confusing but I needed to talk to someone about it. I need to know that someone understands how bad I feel and how I suffer. I would just like to have your feedback if my story ever speaks to you

Thank you if you took the time to read