I hate Grindr flakes. Anyway to actually get them to meet or to know if they will flake?

The weird thing is they are the ones who initiate the convo. Been talking to this dude for some time and he's basically a "straight dl curious guy" and he just wants to get some head. Hot and fit Asian bodybuilder with what looks like 8inches on him.

He said he wasn't sure about doing anything but since I was the only guy who actually showed him proof he wanted to meet me. He used to always have something going on where we couldn't meet due to schedules but today he's free and even though I wasn't, I took a break to meet up and blow him. He was super excited and gave me his address. Once I got there he went quiet. Still online on Grindr and he clearly knew I was there because we talked about it as I was heading there. Messaged him to try and get him to come out and open his front door but he just stayed quiet. Didn't block me and I'm pretty sure I saw him peeking out the window. No response, so I left.

Why? I am trying to meet guys more my type and close to my age but most seem shy, nervous or just ghost. I used to just get upset and move on to someone else, usually downgrading on looks just to get some but I don't want to do that anymore. Whenever I find someone I find attractive and they want to meet it takes some time before they actually are ready to meet. I've had some hot and very cute hookups but most of the ones I talk to ghost or get cold feet the moment you actually plan to meet.

Anything you guys do that makes someone like this get convinced to meet?

Anyway to figure out they will flake before you actually drive to them?

Should I just lower my standards or still struggle through the guys I like to see who actually wants to meet?

Are these catfishes or some weird kink to trick people?

Maybe I need to be the host so I don't have to bother driving for no reason.