Any body wanna talk???

from 6-9 i was molested/raped by my moms best friends son she was supposed to baby sit me but most days after school left me with him nd i would cry nd scream nd say no or beg him to stop but he never cared nd if i said no he’d starve me until i gave in and eventually i started to enjoy it and he introduced me to porn nd i’d copy the girls in the videos. when it stopped i humped pillows nd stuffed animals everyday trying to feel that feeling again until i got older nd found guys to fuck i’m a slut nd i love it but i also can’t help it…will i ever be normal?