I broke up with boyfriend

Yesterday, my boyfriend and I broke broke up after 5 years (we are both in our late 20s). His alcohol abuse started about two years ago but progressively got worse the last nine months. It was an emotionally abusive relationship. I essentially became as emotional punching bag for him. He would say the most evil file things to me and I would just take it because he was drunk and when he was sober he was the man I fell in love with. Even through all that I stayed because I hoped he would get better but he didn’t. There was an altercation and the police got involved which made me pick him up while he was drunk and I left for two weeks. When we reunited it was done. He admitted that he’s still gonna drink and that he doesn’t need any type of help. He’s not gonna get sober. I also found out that hours before we broke up he had already downloaded Tinder. I just feel very overwhelmed and heartbroken. I’m mourning the relationship we had before the addiction. But I’m also so heartbroken that the man the loved is gone and isn’t coming back. That our relationship meant nothing since he already looking at other women. I’m sorry if this is very scattered but I just feel so alone.