How to grow balls and make a decision

I feel like im lacking the balls the end this misery. Married with kid (2y). We started fighting badly about 1.5 years ago, she started telling how she does not like me to touch her when i get to bed, how not to kiss her/slap her butt while she’s doing something else etc etc. I tried being supportive, working two jobs, she stays at home, I clean, walk “our” dogs, and spend at least 4-5 hours of our boy’s wake time and thats on working days. The only thing i rarely do is cook, cause she wants me to count callories etc and always leaves me to cook & entertain the little one at the same time, so i said fuck, i wont be doing that.

Now that I think of it, I had lot of red flags over the years. She’s been manipulating me to cut ties with female friends, not to play video games with friends 2-3 times a week (we live in a city where i have no friends, so does she), she’s been abusing me physically more than a few times. Ok the last one was during arguments, but still - this aint normal, right? Shes been calling my sis alcoholic for having a coctail at 3pm on weekends, same for me for having a beer at 10 am on a beach during a holiday. I do not have a drinking problem, not drinking hard liquor, couple of beers each week and thats it. About 1.5y ago, when we started fighting, I offered going to therapy together and she said and I quote “you go, aint crazy to go, the problem is in you”. She says she does not feel like i put enough in the relationship, but boy… After working two jobs, taking care of the house and also spending quality time with my boy, the only thing I want after 10pm is to relax and not talk/not think. Im all in for having quality time together, but she even refuses to get a babysitter for a few hours or even bring relatives to watch him, so we can go grab a dinner, drinks at a bar or something else…

There is one more big issue.. she managed to get into no contact with my mother, sister and best man (sis hubby). With my mom, I would say it was my moms fault, but the other two are simply refusing cause they see how she treats me when she is angry. No impulse control whatsoever, ive seen flying plates, awful words that hurt like hell and whatnot.

So if somebody asked me if I loved her 5-6 months ago, I would genuinely say YES, now im not so sure… Also the fact that she’s in NC with my sis and best friend is hurting me like hell.

But the biggest factor has been my son… He is deeply attached to me as I am to him. Love him and as a kid of divorced parents I dont want him to go through this… He play with me, he cries for me, he prefers me for almost everything and my friends and family see that. Even while im typing this, the mere thought of spending less time with him makes my eyes go fuzzy. I do understand that even if we are to have less quantity time together, it will be quality time spend together. Not that we are not spending quality time now… its just all so weird. A sample day right now is im getting up together with him arouns 0730, breakfast-game until 0830/0900 and then I try to finish work by 1700 so I spend time with him until dinner. Then I bathe him everything and we take turns on putting him to sleep around 2130~

Question is, how do I grow balls to end the misery? Should I? I will be taking a financial damage atleast for 5-12 months and that does bother me a bit as well. Growing up in single income family has damaged me as well and I always think about being sound financially…

What would my boy think - I broke his family or what? I dont know…