Im done trying to keep a friendship that was not meant for me.

M29. I don’t even know why I’m writing this, maybe just need to let it out somewhere.
There was this girl from my office. We used to talk a lot, go for lunch, attend events, take random walks and all that. Slowly I started to care a lot. Maybe too much.

Then things started to change. She got busy I think, or maybe she was always like that and I just didn’t notice before. Replies got slower, talks got less. I tried to keep it normal, send small messages, memes, just to keep the connection alive. But it started to feel one sided.

I won’t say she did wrong. Everyone got their own way of talking or handling things. But it still hurts when someone who used to talk to you like a friend suddenly acts different, and then you see them all cheerful with others. I don’t even know what I did wrong. Maybe some part of me still wants to know, so I don’t repeat same mistake again.

I know I wasn’t perfect ... maybe I texted too much, maybe I overthought things, but I never meant anything bad. I just wanted a simple friendship where both care a bit equally. Instead it became something where I was always the one trying, always the one scared to say the wrong thing.

I even said sorry so many times for nothing, just to make things fine. But in the end I realised I was just hurting myself.

Now after thinking about it again and again, I finally feel done.
Done saying sorry for caring.
Done begging for small attention.
Done trying to make someone see my worth when they clearly didn’t want to.

I let go of this nonsense for my own peace. I’m not angry, just tired. Tired of waiting for small replies, tired of feeling like I did something wrong just for being kind.

Maybe she already moved on and that’s fine. I just hope one day I also move on completely.

Sometimes caring too much hurts more than not caring at all.