Alone, Survival Work, Depressed.

I went zero contact with my family/friends and started a new life. I am in my early 20's. I am currently working at a massage parlour providing relief services to make ends meet. It is a long story how I ended up doing this work. But Right now, i can't afford to leave until a resume comes back with an interview. My partner has just left me after a really nasty argument. We were starting a fresh life together.

Doing this work is making me feel depressed. I was not ready for this and I have ZERO friends here. I have nobody at all to vent to, to joke about it with, to make plans or try to understand things.

My only choice is to work until I have enough to go home, if I have no interview for normal work by then, that will be my choice.

I just feel alone and angry and stuck and like i have brought this on myself. I am full of mixed feelings I was hoping writing something here would help, but maybe i wont feel any lighter until i hit send. I hate my life fight now, i hate feeling stuck here and i hate feeling alone. I wish I had friends. I wish everything was like it used to be.

For now i have to do what i can and keep moving forward.

Thankyou if anyone bothered reading my vent this far. Hope you are doing better than me.