Why does making friends as an adult feel so hard?

Lately I’ve been feeling pretty frustrated with how hard it is to build real friendships as an adult. When we were younger, making friends felt so natural — but now it seems like everyone is too busy, too tired, or just not interested in putting in the effort.

I’ve tried reaching out, joining activities, being open, and starting conversations, but most connections just don’t go deeper than surface-level small talk. It’s discouraging, and honestly, a little lonely.

For those who have managed to build solid friendships later in life — how did you do it? What actually works? I’d really appreciate some honest tips or personal stories.