never speaks up! this will ruin me completely one day

Kese boluu but i’m someone who never stands for myself even if someone is stepping me on the foot i wont flinch, even if someone hit me with their car i’ll cry & say sorry and walk off despite being hurt ,even if the teacher did unfair in marking or make allegations i’ll never raise voice , Even if someone in bus harass me i will just let it happen , even if the taxi/cab driver charges me 5k for 3km even if someone verbally abuse me or pushes me i wont do any effort to confront. Reason: my throat/soul/tongue will never open up i am afraid the other person will beat me up or double humiliate me and leave me in no position . But after it happens it leaves me hurt and sad to a point where i break down and cant breathe.

Maybe its the way i was taught not to mess with anyone as nobody’s got your back or maybe its because i am a coward or maybe because i’m an weird introvert maybe because i know no-one is there for me but it doesn’t apply when i was a child ps:i’m a middle child and i remember being loud and complaining about them. They got married before we got to grew our bond stronger.

But if u look me physically i look very kind,smiley wont even doubt i’m this type of person.also no amount of conucelling or suggestion would help me in this life i think i will die with this part of me within🪦