Hide something in my backpack, will you? Alright then.

This is an old story that's been going around my workplace for decades, involving two of my colleagues.

We're locomotive engineers. We drive trains, and as is the case with many industries, we have quite a few original characters.

One of which was a prankster, and a bit crude. Liked to make dirty jokes, carried around a fart noise machine, once dropped too many prank fart pills at the office so it smelled for days. Mooned people with his bare ass while driving his trains, or wore a gorilla mask when going past the people waiting on the platforms. All kinds of stuff. Good natured but would lean to the raunchier stuff when bantering. Let's call him East.

The other was a pretty prim and proper gentleman. Religious, orderly, always wore a tie except maaaybe in high summer. Very knowledgable. One thing after the other kind of man and no shortcuts. Let's call him Mo.

Mo had let it be known through casual conversation that every day after work he'd deposit his work backpack to his loving wife and she'd go off to the kitchen to empty it out while he washed up from the days work.

East heard about this, and decided to sneak a couple of porn magazines into said backpack. For Mo's wife to find. Ha ha, very funny I got you sort of thing. Pretty harmless.

Unaware of this, Mo walked home and followed the routine.

And then said absolutely nothing of it to anyone.

Thinking that perhaps it hadn't struck gold, East didn't press the issue and a couple of weeks passed. Not a word of the porn.

And then some time later East got a phonecall from Mo. Would you like to come over this saturday? There'll be some other colleagues, we're having some beers, just some after work relaxing. We'd love for you to join us.

East accepted, and eagerly arrived with a six-pack of beer and his usual sunny disposition.

Mo and his wife greeted him at the door. Welcome welcome, let me take those off of your hands, how was your day? all that.

And then Mo led East through his house and into his living room. We're all in here. Come on in.

Straight into a two hour long church session that Mo had arranged with his congregation to be held at his house. Basically a mass. Priest and everything, loots of people. Full event. Mo introduced East as a friend from work and brought over people to shake hands with and gave the impression that his friend was ever so pleased to join them all at this service.

So as revenge for the still unmentioned porn magazines, the very much not at all religious East had to endure two hours of singing psalms and paying attention to sermons and singing more psalms. He was sat up front.

Then he was walked to the door and they shook hands. Still no mention of the porn. Or the beer, for that matter.

He never pranked Mo again.