Misperceptions Projected onto Other People

Hey all, I know it's a characteristic of BPD to have disproportionate reactions to misperceptions, which is the common cause of mine and my partner's conflict. However, I'm starting to wonder if my partner is projecting their misperceptions about me onto other people. I've had a few interactions where I've had to clarify or correct myself to a third party, while my partner was present, and my partner later reflects to me that this person had some negative reaction that I missed, and my partner proceeds to characterize that reaction into words, essentially saying "this is what that person thought about you." I know facial expressions can say a lot without saying little, but I feel some of these statements are a far reach.

I proceed to feel guilty and confused, and I get outside opinions on whether I should approach the third party and apologize or explain. With each replaying of events, the same observation the outside individuals make is that my partner was attributing unfair, unreasonable, and non-existent thoughts onto a third party. The other common factor, is that these outside people would have not had the same interpretation that my partner and (supposedly) this third party did, and would have understood my intention.

Ultimately, I feel crazy, because I revert back to what I thought to the situation to be, from what my partner made me believe. I never approach these outside people with the intention of being validated, I'm genuinely seeking guidance on how to handle what I was made to believe a big problem, and each person has responded with "you're being made to feel this way."

I'm wondering if anyone has a relatable experience, or advice?