I'm a sore loser and I just want to vent via writing

I'm tired of not being able to express my emotions verbally, it's hard, I don't know how to. I'm 26 yet I'm still like this. I had work, yet I'm A loser who can't stand on her own. My parents kept comparing when I they were my age, they had built a house. That Im not thankful that they're still supporting me until now, that I'm a passive person. Yet they don't respect my decisions, kept berating me, asking why I am like this.

I want to answer they don't have a say why I am like this, since first of all they weren't by my side when I needed them the most (they're working abroad). But I can't express it, since if I did, I feel I'll be the wrong one.i was always be the wrong one.

Ughh I hate this life, I hate myself. Why am I even born? Heck my name is a derivative of the name of my sister.

Ughh.