What is Vyvanse supposed to feel like once the “honeymoon phase” ends?

Hey y’all. This one is a long post, so I appreciate anyone who takes the time to read and let me know their experience.

I’ve been taking Vyvanse for a few months now, but I’m confused on how it’s supposed to be feeling once the “honeymoon phase” wears off. Here’s a summary of my experience so far.

#My first dose (10mg)

This is what my NP started me out with. I know it’s the smallest dose, but even then the results were life-changing. Below is a summary of the different stages and how I felt.

##Before ADHD diagnosis + Vyvanse

Super depressed, unable to start tasks, finishing small tasks made me feel exhausted, constant anxiety and self-loathing.

##1st - 2nd week of Vyvanse (Honeymoon Phase)

Super efficient. Any task that I wanted to do, I could do without any resistance. Was able to accomplish work tasks efficiently, do chores efficiently, and pursue a lot of creative hobbies. Most importantly, the anxiety and depression was completely gone.

This week felt great, but left me feeling absolutely exhausted at the end of the day, and I know that this wasn’t supposed to be the end goal.

##3rd - 5th week of Vyvanse

Efficiency was less, but desirable. I was still accomplishing work tasks and could focus on meetings. Sometimes I’d think about doing the dishes, would have a small amount of resistance, and then be able to get myself to do it. I’d also be able to do a couple big tasks a week, such as cleaning the house, or other work that’s been in my backlog for a while. Creative hobbies were still pursued. Unlike the first week of Vyvanse, I was able to relax when I wanted to, and didn’t feel like I had to constantly clean.

This period of time is what I assumed was what Vyvanse was supposed to feel like when everything settled down.

##5 - 6th week on Vyvanse

The effects seemed to dwindle more. I was still able to accomplish work tasks, but it felt slower. Work meetings were absolutely impossible to pay attention to if they were longer than 15 minutes. I’d procrastinate doing house work, leaving things messy for a few days until finally tidying up to get things mostly normal. Creative hobbies weren’t pursued as much, but still found time once a week. Although not as strong, the anxiety came back a bit, and I began worry about how others at work thought about me (even though they showed no signs of being disappointed in me). I also felt drained by the end of the work day.

Although I can see that this time was better than my pre-medicated state, it felt disheartening to be struggling more again, especially when the first month felt so great, even after the initial boost of first taking Vyvanse wore off. It felt like most of my bad habits came back, and I was only getting a slight benefit.

#My dose increase (20mg)

After I had a week of feeling the effects have diminished greatly, my NP increased my dosage to 20mg to see how that’d work.

My first four weeks, it felt great again. It didn’t feel like my first couple weeks on 10mg (what I perceived was the “honeymoon phase”), but it felt more close to my 3rd to 5th week (good productivity, good focus, able to do tasks with minimal resistance, but still able to relax).

But then by the 5th week (11 weeks total), it felt like the benefits were starting to decrease again, and it felt similar to the 10mg (still able to do work although slower, hard to focus on meetings, hard to upkeep with chores, creative hobbies took a backseat, anxiety came back a bit, felt drained by the end of work).

#Summary

For my initial dose of Vyvanse 10mg, for a couple weeks I felt superhuman. This is what I perceived as the “honeymoon phase”.

The next few weeks, I felt productive, but made aware of my human limitations and felt able to take time to relax. I had a tiny bit of resistance doing some chores, but it was way easier to overcome. My anxiety and spiraling thoughts were nowhere to be seen.

Then by the 5th week, it felt like I was only a bit better than my non-medicated self, able to work, but felt drained afterwards. Anxiety started to come back too.

Increasing my dose helped me return to that phase where I felt like a limited human, but was able to be happy with the tasks I got done in the day, and then relax the rest of the day.

I should also mention this whole time, I’ve been eating healthy, exercising a few times a week, and have been going to therapy. I know Vyvanse isn’t a magic pill that fixes all your problems, so I’ve been trying to have big lifestyle changes.

#My Question

What are you supposed to feel like when the “honeymoon phase” ends?

I felt like the “honeymoon phase” was my first couple weeks, and my few weeks after where I didn’t feel superhuman but was able to accomplish a few good tasks a day and relax was where I was supposed to be.

However, I am wondering if how I feel now is what it’s supposed to feel like when everything settles down, and getting another dosage increase will just help me feel better for another month before getting me back to where I’m at right now.

Is there a dose where I’ll feel like how I did after the first couple weeks, barring the occasional days where life gets tough (something medicine can’t fix)?