i have to put my dad into hospice care

first time poster, actually just found this subreddit! and first, i'm sorry you've all gone through this bullshit! i know the pain.

my dad and i had a very strange relationship, as a child my parents were great, my mom cheated and left him taking us with her to a very small town and we only saw him on the weekends. as a preteen i was pretty ugly and chubby, as most preteens are. around this time was when our relationship got weird. he was very hard on me about my looks and weight and its travelled with me my entire life.

i started to really just resent him and now ive been to therapy and i've forgiven him. about 3 years ago he had a stroke and developed early onset dementia. he has now hit a major decline and needs to be sent to hospice, so he obviously doesn't have much longer.

i'm not necessarily sad about this, i feel he's living in misery and i wish for it to end and him to be comfortable. but what im struggling with is how to help my little brother. he got the disney dad version of our father, although he wasn't in his life very often.

i'm not entirely sure how to be there for him at this time because i don't feel any type of way about this? but i have a feeling it will crush my brother, he's only 11. and he should not have to be suffering through this because my dad was stubborn and proud and wouldn't take medication for his blood pressure. we all tried to warn him and help him.

i just kind of needed to vent and get this all off of my chest. i have a feeling you guys will understand the best of anyone. any advice or help is appreciated 😔