How can I admire men again

When I was younger I truthfully saw all of us us equal. I thought when men politely talk to you, you answer and talk with them. If then they hit on you you either say yes or no in a polite way and that's all. I didn't think a man hitting on me is a bear to run away from and considered that stance respectful. But as I was growing up with lot of friends from both genders, it was my male friends shaming me for answering politely to these men, saying "if you talk to them they believe you wanna fck them right from the hello". So this behaviour of mine decreased. While at the same time men in general would say "women are snob and won't talk to us even for a polite no"

Secondly I really was wondering was sex would be like. How I would perform and be liked by my s.o. and also what would I enjoy. I'd call me romantic and very sexual at the same time. So I tried educating myself on techniques, stds and stuff. Then at 18 entered the sex world. Men from friends to lovers to strangers to other people's stories of men really know almost always nothing about stds. They know extremely little to nothing about pleasure and before you say no, most women fake it because it's really not possible for them to teach after some point of shown incompetence. Like never in my teenage life would I imagine for a logic human to think five minutes is sex. One would say you have hands and tongues to prolong pleasure but surprise surprise men mostly have sex to prove they have a working dick. No connection to the partner no study of techniques. Just "my dick was today chosen over another dick so that's enough".

Women are polyorgasmic but still we haven't really normalised getting educated on woman pleasure. Search orgasm gap between genders and you'll see.

Also men I understand work better when being praised but if most of the time I don't really feel they offer something of significance - and they don't - should I just be a role 24/7 as if I'm talking to my little cousin?

Lastly what girl would imagine having a job a partner and double the chores, double the mental load, half the pressumed pleasure + the possibility of motherhood who instead of a medal gets you treated like Cinderella before the prince.

My thoughts are not routed on all men being bad, I always am tabula rasa while meeting any person. Still the numbers are insane. I wanna connect equally not manipulate a man just because they don't wanna grow up and most women just adjust to the role. Why should I feel different?