Triggered PTSD e9 partner

Our home was semi broken into a few years ago and it really got to my partner (who already suffers from ptsd) We live in a tin can essentially so the door opening sounds are extremely loud.

I came home early and didn’t tell her so I could surprise her (she doesn’t like surprises) and was aggressively fumbling opening the door. I was very excited to see her, I never called out it was me.

Everything combined triggered her ptsd. She’s on new medication recently and she was so happy to finally feel relief she didn’t know was possible.

Now she says she’s in pain again and everything is making her jump and she can’t even talk to the one person she wants to. She says she’s hurt that even after knowing each other for over half our lives I still don’t think about her triggers. She doesn’t feel safe in her home or with me anymore.

This just happened yesterday.

I’m at a loss as to what to do to ease her pain. I told her I was completely in the wrong. That what I did and didn’t do is inexcusable. I can’t stand that she’s in pain. I can’t stand that she can’t trust me. And it’s genuinely all on me.

I would appreciate any advice from any enneagram but especially other 8s who might have advice on how to consistently pause before acting or have navigated a similar situation.