I hurt someone when I was 16

I'm only in my 20s and I got in trouble when I was 16 the courts waited to prosecute when I was 18 I fought it until I was 22 and God I hate even thinking about what I did (it wasn't even anything that bad (my victim even forgives me and says she wants me back as her brother again)

I miss my sister she hated me for years and just this year on my birthday she said do you wanna get a tattoo I want you to remember the day I forgave you (I agreed)

I cry even thinking about my sister I cry so much cause I just miss how she used to be I miss that I changed her into what she shouldn't be

I just wanna die I hate being a felon I hate it all

I have never told anyone this and I need to tell someone that .....it just feels like I have PTSD from this

I wanna die, I want my sister back, I want to .....