Afraid of having kids

I (32F) and my husband (35M) got married in 2024 and since then we've only been intimate one time since being married. We were intimate a lot more before we got married. We are in couples counseling etc but despite this we are not intimate, and I have expressed I want to be. He's called me asking for foreplay etc as 'emasculating' and there's also an issue with him and porn usage.

We purchased a condo together recently and this is our largest shared asset. We have no children and tbh I'm kind of afraid of having kids right now because I work outside of the home, I work long hours, and I come home and the house is usually a mess. Food on the ground etc. He works from home I have to remind him to make basic phone calls etc. He's told me growing up he would intentionally ignore when his Mom would ask him to clean up etc. Last night we were partying with a couple who has a child and they were both describing how they take shifts for one another and in my head I knew my husband wouldn't do this for me.

I just froze my eggs and I'm planning on doing another round in a few months.

He wants kids like before marriage we both did. But now I'm so worried about the workload etc I don't want to. I'm also not physically getting what I need out of the marriage.

Personality wise he's very sweet, he helps drive me to work and drop me off in the mornings and I appreciate this. He will also make me coffee in the morning, and help with cooking. My parents really like him, and his parents like me.

Anyone been in a similar situation or have any recommendations?