How do I win him back?

I'm a 31 year old divorced mom. And after my divorce I started a relationship with a long time friend, that I've known since 1st grade. We reconnected after the divorce just as friends and I eventually took a leap and told him I like him as more than just a friend. And so our relationship began. This all sounds like a nice story so far, right? The big issue is that we both have our own unresolved baggage. I am really anxious, critical of myself, have abandonment issues, endured sexual abuse in the past, low self esteem. I'm working on myself, or at least trying to. I'm going to therapy and I'm trying to look inward more and analyse the reasons behind my actions. He is a 31 year old virgin, depressed, but has been going to therapy for a long time and takes full ownership of his situation. He's kind, loving, gentle, really smart. But also inconsistent, doesn't take care of his appearance or his own environment. I am anxiously attached, he is avoidant. The perfect match...we're both triggers for the others coping mechanisms. Still there is love between us and I can say for a fact that I've never been treated more tenderly by anyone else ever. He's also great with kids. The issue is more on my side. I let things build up until I explode. And when I reach that stage, I'm very unpredictable. 2 months in I broke up with him. I had a lot of doubts and a lot of unresolved trauma from my divorce. I got scared and made a very rash decision that I later on regretted. He gave one more chance and chose to trust me. 6 more months passed and same scenario unfolded. I got stuck on his bad parts and just couldn't see past them. I'm so focused on not repeating the mistakes that I made in my past marriage, and I completely sabotaged myself. I allowed my ex husband too much, he took advantage and the relationship was floating on unkept promises. I observed that my current partner also showed signs of inconsistent behavior and his actions weren't aligned with his promises. But what I was missing was that he needed more time. I wasn't sympathetic to his emotional state as well. I focused just on me, on my needs and if they weren't served, then I'm better of without him. That's so cruel of me. He wasn't aware there was a time limit, he wasn't aware that those things were so important to me. I hurt him deeply and I fully own up to it. After one day I spoke with him, apologised and wanted to try again. But he just couldn't. He asked for time. Time to think and processes his pain. The advice that I need is what can I do in this situation? It's already been two weeks and this time apart is so destabilizing for me. This period of uncertainty is killing me. But it's what he needs.

Should I just wait?