should i teach them to parent me better? should i bother?

i am growing and opening up, but my family is pretty um... well they describe it as "not very touchy feeley" when i cried they said well why dont you go back to yoir room to calm down. we are close and friendly but ive never felt like we have a strong emotional bond or connection with them. i crave it very badly. been reading adult children of emotionally immature parents and they are both different types. my dad is 61 and insists golf is a young mens sport. he says hes still 14 on the inside. my mom has always been kind and chipper but also has a cold judgemental side, although after her moms passing shes been very open to self improvement stuff like "i learned that other peoples reactions to your feelings is not your responsibility" mostly true. i feel like she would get a lot out of the book, but obviously not something you can reccomend to your mom. she loves her book club and so i thought maybe i could ask one of her friends to recommend it to her without saying it was from me.

ive also been pretty open with her lateley about my feelings. i called her very upset and ended up hanging up on her cause it was just the same patt on the head "youll live itll be over soon youre just having a mood swing" it just feels pejorative and insensceer. i later explained i did it because i knew i wasnt going to get what i wanted -comfort- she seemed pretty upset but also listened and understood when i said i dont just wanna hear "its gonna be okay" i need to hear "that is hard, i see why youre upset, my 20s were hard too, etc" and she was open to it.

it hasnt come up since but i have complicated feelings about it, on one hand im very proud i did it and grateful that she listened and had a measured reaction- on the other hand im lowkey crushed and heartbroken that i have to teach my own parents to parent me.

it feels like picking up a puppets hand and patting myself on the head with it. especially after a childhood of parenting my brother and having more of a friendship than parental relationship with them. i want a close relationship with them but there is also a gross bitter resentment feeling that i can only have what i needed as a child by telling my parents i need it and how to give it to me. it makes me feel ungreatful and pious and attention seeking.

part of me says just leave it. it could be so much worse. but its also so close to being better and i hate seeing that too.

TLDR do i slip my open minded but emotionally closed off mom a copy of adult children of emotionally immature parents via one of her book club friends? should i just keep pathetically asking for what i need? i already tried pulling away. i have no friends in town, im so loneley.