Back to square one

I let myself think I could drink. I let myself think it was okay and that I could have a few drinks. And that worked for a while. But last night I completely blew it. Blackout drunk. Made a mess, embarrassed myself. Engaged in risky behaviour and turned into a person I just don’t recognise.

The hangover is awful. The anxiety is terrible. The guilt overwhelming and the regret so strong.

I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what this post even is for, it’s just a cry for help.