I think I have NPD

Hello, everyone.

I've been reading this forum for a while without daring to write anything, but today I've made up my mind.

I've always thought that I simply had a “strong personality,” that I liked to lead, help, and be admired. Until the people who loved me discovered that I was lying to them, and I had to disappear. Since then, I've felt increasingly alone.

Reading this forum, I think I might also have traits of narcissistic personality disorder: I need to imagine a world where I am special, unique, and admired... when I think about my reality, I feel an unbearable emptiness and pain. I think that's why I invent another imaginary version of myself, a much more pleasant one.

I want to learn to be happy with who I am and not depend so much on the opinions of others.

Has anyone been through something similar? How are you coping with it? Can it be solved?"