just hit dermis for the first time, not as big of a deal as I had anticipated

My first cut today just hit dermis, because I pressed a bit more than usual out of frustration. Its not super in there but at least a bit. Quite a weird feeling in those few moments, where you contemplate, if you actually hit it or not. I only did a few more epidermis swipes. I had steri strips on hand, since I have always been well prepared, applied them a bit crooked, but fine for a first timer I guess. I hope that it heals well. I dont need harm reduction tips, Ive read up on this.
I wonder how I could let it come to this. Before I felt way more pain, but today I really didnt.
Im emotionally cold right now and really dont care. I never wanted to go this deep, but eh, shit happens.
How much do your (shallower) cuts to dermis scar?