Been called disgusting whole life which has caused trauma/ emotional turmoil.

I vividly remember how people, when I was a child, during early school years up until teenage years would avoid me. As a child I was called disgusting all the time and gross without further explanation. Whenever for example a friend hugged me they would clap their hands to remove the remains of me from their hands, as if they were removing dust. If my hand accidentally touched my friends they would brush their hands on their jeans.

People looked at me and said “ euw”.

As I move further to high school , I was ostracized. I went to the school counselor to seek support in handling all of the cyber bullying and psychological bullying I faced. She was good but started resenting me over how the situation was overwhelming, and difficult. My friends ( from other schools) took the falling out of our relationship in their own hands, and booked a meeting with her.

She kept telling them that the thing is that people can’t be forced to be with me. She even onced said that I was disgusting because I one time accidentally spilled a bit food on my shirt during lunch time, but that I at least don’t smell like other student she have meet before. Disgusting. That word repeated itself. From someone I should have trusted. To be called this alongside with being mistreated has really takes a big toll on me.

And no this has nothing to do with hygiene. I take care of myself and always had. As a child my mothers made sure I looked good and put together.