I was on pace to shoot a PB today….

Decided to sneak out for a round today and went on an absolute heater. -2 after 11 and was in complete control of my game. I pretty much had the course to myself (thank you college football) and was cruising along, playing the first 12 holes in just under 90 minutes.

Walking off the 14th tee box I saw them. Coming up the opposite fairway, a fivesome. Fuck. No big deal I tell myself, the course I wide open in front of them, so hopefully they’ll let me through. I get to the green and as I’m walking off I notice there’s ANOTHER fivesome teeing off. Double fuck. I head to the next par 3, which I end up bogeying to put me at -1 thru 14.

I come up to the hole that I first saw the fivesomes on. One group is walking off the green and the other is waiting to approach. I end up waiting almost 20 minutes while each of these clowns walks from the cart (path only due to rain), lasers the flag, walks back to the cart, pulls a club, walks to their ball, goes through their (not brief) routine, and hits. Rinse and repeat x5. Once they’re on the green I hit my drive and gleefully watch as they each line up their putt like they’re playing to keep their tour card, while the rest stand there and watch. Another 15 minutes and I hit up onto the green. I end up with another bogey so now I’m even.

As I’m walking to the next tee the entire group ahead is looking at me, and I hope that they’re gonna wave me up. Nope. They all fly off to the fairway to play their second shots.

So goes the next hour and a half. I waited at least 15 minutes on every. single. shot. I came in at +3, dropping 5 shots in five holes. I was fuming by the time I walked off 18.

As I’m walking to my car, two of the guys ahead of me come up in their cart and toss me a “hey sorry for holding you up buddy!” It took everything in my soul to not chew them out in front of the starter, but I ignored them and kept walking to my car. Behind me I heard both of them talking about what an asshole I was.

Was it their fault my game went cold? Probably not. But fuck fivesomes, and fuck poor etiquette.