Helplessly addicted

Just feels helpless. I'm trying to quit but honestly my antipsychotic makes me want to get high because I feel nothing on it. I'd rather feel high. But getting high is probably what got me here in the first place.

I take my haldol and I have trouble getting out of bed and sometimes I'll sleep a whole day away. If I want to get out of bed I have to down a couple hundred milligrams of caffeine. This absolutely sucks.