My boyfriend made a comment that made me a little uncomfortable. How should I talk to him about it?
I tried posting this in the relationship advice subreddit, but mods said this situation is better suited for this subreddit.
I, 25F have been dating my boyfriend, 27M for about 9 months now. This past weekend him and his friends went to a huge Halloween party in another city, and me and my friends went to it too. This was his first time meeting my 2 best friends. He has spoken to them briefly when I’ve been on call with him and they’ve been around, and they all get along pretty well.
So last night, my boyfriend stayed over because he didn’t want to drive back to his city at like 1am. When he was over I asked him how the party was for him and how it was meeting my best friends for the first time. He said they were really nice and chill people, which made me happy. At the party he told me and my friends that 2 of his friends that were at the party were interested in hitting her up. We were talking about this and I told him that I showed her his friends pictures and she wasn’t really feelin them. I also told him that she is talking to several other guys so I’m not sure how his friends would feel about that if either of them hit her up. Then he says “if me and you weren’t dating and I hit her up, what do you think she would say?” Obviously my face dropped and he could tell, and instantly started to say “I’m sorry that came out wrong. I was trying to crack a joke that didn’t land. I’m not into her i promise.” English isn’t his first language so he always blames that when he says something that rubs me the wrong way. But if I’m being honest, his English really is not that terrible for him to be messing up like this.
I didn’t say too much last night cuz I didn’t know what to say, and he was staying at my place so I didn’t want to kick him out in the middle of the night since he lives 4 hours away. He thinks what he said hit me hard because I’m on my period and “emotional”, but that’s not true. Yes I am feeling the hormones, but I would’ve felt hurt regardless of pms. How do I bring this up to him? Is it even something I should bring up, or let it go? Thank you.
Posted Nov 3, 2025, 9:12 PM UTC · locked