I joined a vc for a first time and now I want to crawl into a hole and never come out

I don't do well speaking, specially in groups. Today I decided to enter a voice chat in a server for the first time ever and try to socialize. I felt like maybe it was a step in the right direction and a chance to confront my fears. It went bad. We were four people. When I joined, they already were talking about something. I tried to join the conversation but my mind went blank. Everytime I spok, it was in short, awkward sentences. Everything I said sounded stupid and robotic but I didn't know what else to say. I eventually stopped trying to say anything. I stayed in silence for twenty minutes, disassociating out of awkwardnes , while the others keep talking. They where all having a good time and getting along really well while I was there like a fucking weirdo. I should have expected that. Now I can't stop thinking about how awkward it was. I feel so stupid for trusting myself to do better.