i wanna end this all today

i feel like i’ve been treated like a pushover all my life. i can’t even do anything about it because i’m such a people pleaser.

as a result, i feel like everyone’s taking advantage of me. for example, i bought my own car bcs my mom refuse to let me use hers to practice driving, but once I got it, she gaslighted me into letting my brother used it instead because i’m too much of a coward to actually drive (according to her). Whenever i attempt to get it, they just find a way to guilt trip me.

i moved out 3mos ago in hopes of finding peace, but I’m still obligated to contribute a huge portion of my paycheck at home (on top of the monthly amortization for the car they use). That aside, my mother wants me to take in my younger siblings from time to time without contributing to groceries / bills.

i know she’s fucked up but i can’t do anything about it. i’m bound to her and i’m too much of a pathetic loser so i just cry myself to sleep every night. i can’t do this anymore. i just want this to end already.