Struggling to mentally detach after unstable breakup — looking for advice on moving forward (29M/37F)

I was in an on-and-off relationship for about 1.5 years with a woman (37F). I’m 29M, also from overseas.

Communication was difficult.
She often dismissed my suggestions, got offended easily, and arguments escalated quickly. Breakups happened often — she initiated most of them. I usually tried to reconnect afterward, which probably made things more complicated.

Money expectations were also mismatched.
I usually paid for outings. She preferred that, but rarely reciprocated with effort in other ways. We also adopted a cat together; she now keeps it and doesn’t want me to visit.

Our last breakup was ~3 weeks ago.
At first I tried reaching out; she told me not to contact her anymore, so I respected that and stopped. Recently she was upset that I spent time with someone new shortly after the breakup. We exchanged a few messages, but communication was hostile. Since then, no contact.

Now I’m struggling with the emotional part.
Even though the relationship wasn’t stable, I still think about her every day. It’s affecting my focus and mood. I know it’s better that we ended things, but mentally I’m stuck.

I’m not looking for moral judgment — only coping strategies.

What helped you detach or move forward after:

• an unstable relationship
• repeated breakups
• strong emotional attachment
• no-contact

Any advice, routines, or mindset shifts that helped would be appreciated.