help

Hello,

I come for adivice, I am a biological gay male (19). I have considered being trans but I am so conflcited. I have the typical story of knowing I was different since I was 6, came out as gay early, extremely feminine, girl toys, girl friends etc. My mom even took me to therapy at age 7/8 because she thought I was trans and they said I wasnt becasue I would draw myself as a boy. I even got confused for a girl until I was 17 when I had longer hair (however I didn't like people referring to me as a girl at the time). My signs of dysphoira is sometimes I am uncomfortable with doing typically male things but I comfort myself by telling myself "girls do this too". I also like being feminine but I don't like feeling like a cross dresser so I limit myself in some ways. I also hate when guys I am dealing with show attraction to my genitals. I definitely do have some signs but I do also have OCD and anxiety and sometimes over analyze my feelings. I also have some moral concerns because I respect biological women so much and would never want to make them uncomfortable and think I am competing with them or want to harm them. Im naturally fem in build and face, and the thought of that fading is very daunting honestly, but at the same time I like being a pretty boy. I dont know its all so difficult, espically seeing all the trans who wish they transitoned at my age but I dont know if its the right choice for me yet. Oh and also sometimes im concerned my desire to be a girl is internalized homophobia or its all about looks since when I see a not so attractive girl or one that doesnt match my style I wouldnt wanna trade places with her despite her being a woman (not to be rude just an observation) Any advice?