i hate how i look i hate having acne

i hate my acne so much, it makes me want to kill myself. I hate everything about my face, my nose, its so embarrassing to go outside. I wear makeup but at the same time, i dont want to wear makeup because it makes my acne worse but i keep wanting to hide my scars and acne. i’ve tried everything to get rid of it, ive gone to multiple dermatologists, but none has worked gosh i hate it